-On the French;

The French have only ever won two wars in all of history, the first was the second phase of the Hundred Years War, which was won by Joan of Ark, afterwhich they burned her at the stake. The Second war the french won was the French Revolution, which was a civil war, so a frenchman had to win! Now honestly, are we supposed to care about a nation full of gay losers?         

and oh by the way, who the hell gave these pansies nucks anyway?

-On the State of the World

You know it's a real fucked up world when the best rapper is a skinny white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the French are calling the Americans arrogant, the Germans don't want to fight, the Commie Russians are turning a profit, the Canadians are actually making a significant contribution to a war effort, the Polish are doing something smart by backing the U.S. and a landlocked European nation wins the highest honors in yachting, Switzerland winning the America's Cup over New Zealand. The only reason they won is because they bought out all the good sailors from every other syndicate. They should be drawn and quatered, and their blood money burned, or put into making more Lasers. Anyway...there is always the next challange...